My Pride on the Line
by Gin van Geovanni
Summary: The World allows people to be anything they wish to be, except for themselves. However, just because something is not accepted does not mean that it will not be done. Slight Haseo/Endrance/Azure Kite
1. To Haseo

Pre note: This month is LGBT Pride month and even though is an online billboard of it I decided to add more to it –teehee-

-Whoops . . . I know I posted this an hour ago, but there was an unfinished paragraph at the end, so yeah if you've read it already please read the last part again and once again sorry for the inconvenience.

**My Pride on the Line**

**By the Not So GeniusVampire**

The World allowed you to be whatever you wanted to be . . . accept for yourself. Not even The World willingly sheltered those who loved others not quite of the same sex. Interracial relationships were just fine, but relationships of the same sex were seen as a liability to balance. Of course, just like in real life not liking something did not stop people from doing it. And this option was open to anyone . . . _anyone at all._

Azure Kite sat on the edge of the fountain in the Alchemy District of Mac Anu, the edges of a two blue envelopes crumpling in his hands. 'It's strange enough for two guys to be together, but three, it's insane . . . We have to keep this quiet but sometimes it feels like we're keeping quiet to ourselves . . .' He scuffled his feet against the concrete and chewed his bottom lip. He looked left then right then he slowly put the envelopes down and walked away. 'This is risky, but I have to get my thoughts across to them before something bad happens . . .'

A young teen with white hair and crimson eyes picked it up, looked around in same manner as Azure Kite then opened it. A few minutes later a tall slender man with shoulder length aqua hair picked up the other one and disappeared.

* * *

_To Haseo:_

_There is so much I want to say to you and so much that I feel, but all I ever really wanted to know is whether or not I am alone in my feelings . . ._

_I've admired you for so long, so long that even _I_ have lost track of how much. When we first met you thought I was your enemy, and when you found out otherwise you thought I held some kind of grudge over you because of your past misjudging. I thought the same, but I've told you this already. However, I still liked you after all you didn't delete my address and once again you did not hate me. I was glad for that, it made it easier for me to watch- err . . . survey you from afar._

_I called myself your watcher and acted as though I was content with that, for a while I was, but at the same time I was not. At the time I wanted so much more than your respect. I wanted to be connected with you . . . I wanted to be close to you, but at that time you still did not truly know who I was. I tried so hard to get you to notice me, to respect me, at least to look at me. When I finally got you to notice me, I found it was easier than I believed it to be, as did you. _

_Afterwards, you trusted me much more than before. Little by little you opened up to me, and I to you. Eventually I began to place that was myself into your hands. Everything in these hands of mine, I gave to you. Even though you already had someone equally important to you someone you wanted to be with for all time. There were times when I wanted the same thing, and the need grew stronger when you began to trust and acknowledge me. However, I was unsure if I was right in my feelings for you if it was right for me to even have feelings . . ._

_You told me there was nothing wrong with me, that as long as I felt no shame in what I wanted there would be no regret in my actions . . . as long as I did not do anything too outrageous –lol-._

_Now that there are three of us, and each of us is perfect yet imperfect in our own way (although I am sure a certain blade brandisher would disagree, he's perfect it's kinda cute, I didn't say that). We are as some would say one entity, one mind, and one . . . spirit?! That's weird I'm technically not supposed to have that, then again, I'm not technically supposed to do or have half the things I do . . . have . . . OH YOU GET IT, DON'T YOU?! _

_Eheh . . . anyway because of you I've felt so much, done, so much more than ever, and even found that I have things in common with people I probably wouldn't have associated myself with in the past (that includes YOU lol). _

_What I'm trying to say is thank you Haseo, thank you so much, and ILY kay?_

_Kite of the Azure Flame_

_P.S.: What you thought I was going to put something cheesy at the end? This whole letter is cheesy, heck, ILY is cheesy seriously._

_P.P.S.: I sent Endrance one too, after all you both belong to ME lol._

_P.P.P.S.: lol is dorky . . . unless I say it. See you later Haseo._

* * *

Two days later, Azure Kite returned to the fountain. He slipped his hand in the cool water and swished it around. 'He never replied . . .' He thought. 'I never thought he would, but . . . I just want to know that I'm not the only one feeling anything . . .' He clinched his fist and his body shook. He felt someone's hand touch his wrist lightly then another one closed around his free hand. He turned around slowly. Haseo had the hand that was in the water while Endrance lightly grasped both his and Haseo's. Azure Kite was too frozen to even think. He tensed even further when they both leaned closer to him. He relaxed at four simple words:

"You are not alone."

* * *

A/N: See? Isn't this much lighter than my usual stuff? Well the letter is lighter than unual anyway. I know it's a bit all over the place and kind of weird, but not bad for something thought up and typed in about an hour. I'll try to do a letter to Endrance next time okay?

Oh yea, and ILY means I Love You if anybody missed it.


	2. To Endrance

All righty here's part two by popular demand!

**My Pride on the Line**

**Chapter 2**

The World, a place where a person could be whatever they wanted to be; with the exception of themselves . . . There were things that were accepted and things that were not. Just like there were things . . . people that others were meant to love and people that were not. Even an 'open' place like The World did not fully approve of a relationship between two people of the same gender. Some people of course hid this by hiding their gender such as a male having a female character to be with his boyfriend online or a female playing a male in order to be with her girlfriend somewhere. However, there are others who opted to find other ways.

Endrance, the most tempting blade brandisher in all The World was one such person. He held together both of his short tempered secret lovers; the silver adept rogue Haseo and the unusual AI Azure Kite. His heart stopped every time he got even the barest glimpse of Haseo, but he was unsure of how Azure Kite felt about him.

After being with the AI for six months he wondered if Azure Kite was only tolerating him, something he found both strong and strange.

Today, he saw him at the Alchemy District of Mac Anu, he sat on the edge of the fountain fiddling with two envelopes in his hand and twitching his feet. The AI caught sight of him. With the barest of movements he indicated that one of them was for Endrance. The AI placed it down slowly and left as though he were made out of smoke. Haseo appeared shortly afterwards, regardless of what was written he was a brave soul for reading it out in the open. As much as Endrance wanted to something for once held him back.

All he could do was exit into his own private spot and open the blue envelope.

_To Endrance:_

_Don't mind this too much it's just the ramblings of an insane little AI with way too much time on his hands and mind, and the heart he thinks he has._

_I've always thought that it was weird for me to have feelings, after all what use do they have for I needed to do? Why would I need emotions like anger, fear, confusion, sympathy . . . love . . . What would I need something like that for? I thought I was a tool, not that it was a bad thing; I just thought that that was all I needed to be. My thoughts changed after there was nothing left to fight. Those periods of rest were brief, but not brief enough to erase the rising feeling of confusion inside of me. When I first saw you it was only a glimpse and not a very good one either, but when I met you for real (as in I at least knew your name) I envied you a little more than I ought to have; after all why should I envy someone I first met? Of course this too was a part of my growing emotions; my growing need to combust inside my mind._

_It was you who helped me out of that spinning world. In truth you were the first person to actually understand the utter chaos inside of my mind and how to get out of it. It was you who told me that en or _

_otherwise is first and foremost meant to extenuate your existence and open it up to that many more people which are why even when brief ones end there is an empty space. How the empty space will be filled or not depends on the person and when they feel the place is ready to be filled. Another factor is who they choose to fill the space with._

_I chose Haseo to fill that space, but you had chose him long before the thought even crossed my mind. And you were so candid in your own way; somehow your uniquely (I can't believe I'm saying this) Divine way of speaking was taken in even in a closed convoluted world such as this one. I have to admit when I found this out I had no idea of what to do; I already felt envy because you knew so much about me without having to know me at all and now I have to compete with you?! I had no idea how to react so I just kind of kept it in as best I could and just . . . walked . . . it wasn't the smartest option, but it was a halfway sane one._

_I think Haseo posed that the three of us go out together, I distinctly remember wanting to pull my hair out. I could tell by the look on your face that you weren't too thrilled about it either even more so than me because you've known Haseo longer if not anything else. But we still went along with it, it wasn't like we had much of a choice really, besides at least he was honest about wanting both of us; anyone else would have lied and tried to float between us. That would have been disastrous._

_Well, it started out as a disaster anyway. I have no idea why you keep making me out to be the one with jealous streak, you may be better at hiding it but you still have an awful one. Anyway, as a result of not wanting to share we just did subtle things here and there from the two of us to say 'I don't like you go away.' They were stupid things like when you pushed me over the Mac Anu Bridge, or that time I stopped Haseo from getting one of your e-mails. The fighting had to be the worse, Haseo to this freaking day has no idea of how many times we've fought behind his back, he caught us one out of . . . IDK how many times . . . I stopped counting after one fight went on for four hours._

_It was after that one in particular that you said we maybe overdoing things; putting our energy into something pointless. I didn't want to admit it at the time but I agreed with you completely; aside from that I was too wiped out to argue, heh. But how exactly do two people go from being obsessively competitive towards each other to somewhat complacent if not at least civil? Beats me._

_Although I have to admit it's nice to know when someone else knows how to solve a problem, y'know they start you off, but you're the one who ends up not shutting up. Like the first time we actually talked. You told me your (I prefer the word 'jealous', but if there's another word by all means . . . fill in the blank) streak came from the fact that very few people stayed by your side. Do you realize how crazy that sounded to me? The most sought after man in the World talking about being lonely, honestly . . . but I knew what you meant most of those people would run in fright if they knew half of your personality. I'm not just talking about our relationship either . . . you're evil and scary when you feel like it . . . and vain at times . . . Anyway you talked of how you lost those closest to you and a part of you would always beat yourself up about it because you thought you were weak. Then when you found something to protect, it turned out you were being used. Haseo played a major role in sorting your mind out and now all you want to do is stay by his side as long as time allows, and y'know what Haseo wouldn't have things any other way. He hasn't said it but we both know by now that he's just a big softie on the inside . . . I suppose I am too . . . (Hint: I'm in for that long eternity too). _

_I told you that I actually have very little confidence; what is seen as clear conviction is nothing more than me running in the opposite direction because if I stop to think about it I truly will go the wrong way. Because of that I end up disoriented if something suddenly comes up or when the pace slows for even a second. I think I also said that the main reason I even fought you at all was because I felt overshadowed by you. You literally had everything I did not and I'd be somewhere behind not just you but Haseo as well. You told me point-blank that was not possible because Haseo did not 'settle' for me he 'wanted' me and that I ought to be more confident if not for that. _

_That bit of time changed my outlook on you a lot. I hope the same thing happened on your end, En. Honestly, though, I've never completely thought ill of you, like I said the most negative I've thought was envy, and that was out of feeling a little hopeless, anyhow, enough of the theatrics! The bottom line is that it may not seem like it all the time, but I do care about you a lot (sometimes more than Haseo) and you've helped me in ways I could never fully return mentally or physically. I wish I could do better than this letter, but I'm trying GIVE A GUY CREDIT FOR THAT AT LEAST!_

_. . . I'm sure you know what ILY means . . . that's how I feel about you okay?_

_Kite of the Azure Flame_

Two days later Endrance saw Azure Kite at the fountain, the AI appeared drained as he dipped his hand in the water and moved it around a bit. Even now, his words floored Endrance, mostly because he covered everything the blade brandisher was thinking about. Not only that, but he bared all of his thoughts, something that had to been a challenge. He knew the latter was not paying any attention to his surroundings (one look at his eyes told that) so as quietly as possible he settled next to him and placed his hand over the hand not in the water. He had not noticed Haseo from a distance, but now that both he and Azure Kite were in view, he took both of their hands.

Very few people noticed them, and at that moment it would not have mattered, especially after Haseo whispered four simple words:

"You are not alone."

A/N: Whew! I'm done! This chapter was waaay longer than I first thought, but it's mostly because I have a hard time writing Azure Kite and Endrance not acting as rivals. I hope I did a good job, and I may do one more letter (and possibly finish some of these other stories).


	3. To Kite

It's the GeniusVampire here with another lovely love letter, this time with a little twist to it. What is it, you ask? I'm not going to tell you'll just have to read! Well just one spoiler, I like to play with the idea of Azure Kite being able to reformat data so he can probably just think it.

Okay enough out of me.

**My Pride on the Line**

**Chapter 3**

The World was becoming one confining place to live in, but it is an even harder place to live in when a person is unable to leave it. That includes the AIs that reside within it as well. One such AI was Azure Kite; he burned as brightly as the flames he was named after to leave the World. He knew he would be leaving one world full of obstacles for another one, but he would rather be in a harsh world next to the ones he cared for most than a world that would beat him down in the pixilated dust. Besides that, those two people were not even here.

He drew himself up and looked up at the sky. 'The days are getting longer . . . darker . . . lonelier . . .' the field was brightly laminated by the sun and the grass was a refreshing green, however, the AI's mind was buried in a deep, dark quagmire. His mind could be nowhere else without Haseo or Endrance around, they had not logged on for about a month, and he needed desperately to be around them. 'It's raining . . .' he thought sadly.

As soon as the thought came by, the sky darkened fog layered itself around the field, and the grass dulled. A thick rain hammered down on the stitched knight. His hair fell flat on his head despite his thick hat. 'That's not enough, that's not nearly enough . . .' as the thought crossed his mind a hard wind began to blow, knocking his cap off and thoroughly drenching him. 'Heh . . . maybe I should add a little hail . . . no I'm no fan of pain or the cold . . . but I feel cold anyway, so perhaps a little snow . . . but no wind or rain.' As the thought came the wind and rain stopped and a light snow began to fall.

For the first time in a while, Azure Kite smiled faintly as a few flakes fell into his hand. 'It's . . . pretty . . . I wish it were real though . . . I wish I were real too . . .'

"That lonely look doesn't suit you, Kite." A distantly familiar voice chided in his ear.

The knight jumped quick enough to butt the voice's owner in the chin. 'Ouch . . . oh!' He turned around to face Haseo who fanned his tongue frantically.

"Ouch! Geez you have a hard head! I almost bit my tongue off!" he laughed lightly. "Well at least it _didn't_ fall out, so no harm done."

A stricken look passed though the AI's bright jade eyes. His shoulders shook and he backed away then in a flash he was the other side of the field.

"H-hey! I didn't know this was gonna be a chase!" he began to run after Azure Kite; however, he warped away when Haseo was just close enough to touch his hair. After doing this for about five minutes, Haseo began to tire out. "A-all right . . ." He panted. "You . . . win . . . Kite . . . now could you come to me?"

Even from that sizeable distance, he saw Azure Kite shake his head.

"What? Why not?"

He shook his head again.

"Hm? Are you sad?"

Azure Kite shook his head.

"Cold?"

He shrugged and gave a half nod.

"Oh? But that's not the case is it?"

Another nod.

"Then . . ." an odd look formed in Haseo's crimson eyes. "Are you . . . angry at me?"

The AI nodded for a final time, even more vigorously than the other times.

Haseo stepped back 'I didn't expect to be right!' He thought bewildered. "Uh . . . why?"

The latter replied with an offended and hurt look then he sank to the snowy ground shivering.

"Huh?" Haseo walked slowly towards Azure Kite, but he did not touch him, in fact he stopped mere inches away. He seemed taken aback when the AI fixed him with a bit of a pleading expression and wrapped his arms around his shaking limbs; his shivering breaths materialized in small, white clouds. Haseo let out a breath of his own, looked around, and then wrapped his arms around his shivering companion. "If you hate the cold then maybe you ought to make warmer climate alterations." He pulled him closer.

'Haseo . . . no I can't let him off the hook so easily!' He slipped out of Haseo's arms.

"Aw c'mon, Kite don't be that way. I have a pretty good reason for . . . eh . . . not seeing you for so long. I wanted to, believe me, but . . ."

With his back turned, Azure Kite glanced back briefly only to advert his eyes.

"Kaoru, I mean, Endrance is sick."

Stricken, Azure Kite wheeled around.

"That's right . . ." Haseo's voice began to shake. "I don't know how it happened, but a couple of weeks ago, he went overseas, and barely came back . . . he got pneumonia . . . so much for exotic scenery . . ." He sighed. "The first day he returned we thought it was just a little cold and that the change in scenery had contributed to him not improving sooner; and a few days' rest would do the trick . . . it seemed to have worked, he got out of bed and moved around. However, two days after that I logged in and he called me then . . . he collapsed over the phone . . . He's being picky about who'll attend to him, in fact those people are limited to . . .me."

Azure Kite sighed 'So he's alive and Haseo's been caring for him this whole time. I can't be mad at them for that.'

A sudden alarm went off, it was not an e-mail, nor was it a text message. Haseo sighed in worried/labored sort of way. "I'm sorry Kite but I kinda timed my visit, I'm really sorry!"

The stitched knight shook his head and placed both hands on the rogue's shoulders and shook his head; he shook his head over and over and over again as if to shake something from his mind. His emerald jewels for eyes appeared to mist over then he hugged Haseo around the neck. 'I'm glad he came at all.'

'Kite . . . Kaoru was right . . . you really are sensitive to loneliness . . .' He held Azure Kite at arm's length. "Don't worry I'll be back when I can, all right, and I promise it'll be sooner than a month . . . By the way . . ." Haseo fumbled around for something in his pocket. "Endrance strained himself to type this for you, so you better read it, got it?" He winked then warped away.

'And like that I'm by myself . . . well . . .' He looked down at the ornately decorated letter in his hands. 'Not entirely . . .'

_Dear Kite,_

_I know you have been burning to open a letter like this, 'to' just sounds so cold and businesslike, don't you agree? It is much easier to open this way because later the words will not feel so impersonal. And yes, I fully believe that a mere greeting will do that much to a person, the same way I believe a single person can change the course of the life of another, and sometimes they do not even realize it._

_I am sure Haseo has told you by now that I have been ill for the past few weeks and refuse attention from no one else but Ryou (Haseo in The World). It sounds a little strange, but I assure you that I am taking every necessary precaution possible. Believe me Haseo is not alone there are people who deliver what I need and an expert physician on my case every other hour; therefore do not worry too much about me, we will see each other soon. I would have preferred to meet sooner, but both my doctor and Haseo had my cell phone, terminal, and laptop under chains and surveillance cameras._

_This has to have been a loathsome and lonely burden for you to bear alone, and I feel responsible for that. After all, your letter revealed (to me) that you only felt any real connection to Haseo and me. I will admit even I felt overwhelmed I thought that I meant something . . . anything to you. Then I felt relieved, it alleviated some of the stress I felt (amazing as that sounds I have felt stressed before). It meant that you no longer just tolerated my presence; it also meant that you did not merely accept it, but you actually wanted it. You wanted me, needed me even._

_Much like you that is all I ever searched for in another person, be it male or female, human or otherwise, all I ever wanted was to be needed. At one point I did not care if I was being used, if it meant not being disposed of like a ghastly piece of nothing then I would gladly be used until there was nothing left to use. Had Haseo not called out to me when and how he did, I would not have known the difference between being needed, as in being valuable; or needed as in wanted for a second and discarded when beaten only once. Haseo taught me that difference, and I am learning another form of it from you, Kite._

_Even now do you know how much we have in common? When I was younger I had even less confidence than you. It seemed as though everyone else around me had something special about them, something that made them special to themselves and everyone else around them, but I always seemed to fall short, even now a part of me thinks I fell short back then. However, I learned the hard way that if there is something truly detestable about yourself that you want to . . . need to change then no one else can change it but yourself. I changed my insufferable shyness, whether it is for better or worse is for me to decide and for the ordinary people to deal with. Believe it or not Kite you went through several of these changes in the span of a few months in addition to our . . . exaggerated rivalry. _

_However, there are things that are more important than fighting to have other people notice you. There will also be the people who notice you for simply being in their line of vision; and I am not talking about when you jump in their face and force them to look you in the eye but when you happen to be in the same area and they see you. You chose Haseo, but in that same respect Haseo naturally chose to notice you. Choices like this happen because there is something about the both (or three) of them (meaning us) have a connection to each other. If it is meant to be then it happens if not, then I doubt you would be reading this letter right now._

_In several ways you are the one holding the three of us together. There is much for you to learn about as far as life itself is concerned, but there are things that we learn from you as well. Since there are things that you are unaware of you are more open and more expressive with your feelings. In several respects, you are innocent and that innocence allows us to reinvent the very definition of being human. You reinvented the definition of feeling, following one's own destination, belonging to or with only the one's you want to be with; those who accept you for yourself and do not expect you to be anyone else. I know there have been times where you are unsure of your place in this World or any other and there is no way anyone (including myself) can truly say that the feeling has never reared its awful head, but it is good that you know not to stay there, and that is one of your most admirable traits. You not only keep up with what you know and see, but you also stay ahead of it and even when you see your limits you see them through surpass them. You even know that there is such of a thing as victory within failure (although I am positive you know nothing of losing to me.)._

_Kite of the Azure Flame . . . azure . . . the bluish violet color of the base of the flame. Did you know that the bluer the flame the hotter it is? It is also the purest. Believe me not even a white flame can compare, white is not a color it . . . it is nothing. Your color is mellow, it is shy, it can be bold, and it has always been beautiful. _

_Kite, continue to burn brightly, and know that your flame is not the only thing that burns. Your heart is both warm and pure and it lights the hearts of those closest to you. It did it to Haseo and it has done it to me as well. Once again I know this illness will leave me in no time at all and we can meet again. Be prepared for a surprise that day. Until then all I can say is:_

_I Love You_

_Endrance "The Temptress"_

_Or Kaoru Ichinose_

Azure Kite's first reaction was that of surprise. 'Forget waiting until you get better this letter is enough to keep me surprised for a few months' He thought. '. . . Ryou . . . Kaoru . . . their real names are just as attracting as their PC names.' He sighed. 'I've been sitting here thinking about what it must be like to feel real . . . all this time . . . they think I'm as real as any other human being on the other side.' He reached out his arm, and few snowflakes fell in his outstretched hand. 'All of a sudden this world looks a little brighter . . .'

The snow glistened as a silver moon began to rise.

A/N: -faint- The GeniusVampire is soooo tired so she apologizes if this chapter did not come out quite as coherent as the first two. However, she hopes that you will drop her a review line anyway. Please?

-Oh and about Azure Kite thinking about long, dark days well, like most game addicts he's always in the game and has a weird concept of night and day . . . In fact, that statement stems from a question I have had for a while, does Azure Kite have a concept of night and day at all considering the time in the World can be altered depending on the area words. In short he was assuming it was night . . . It also comes from the fact that he was depressed. The moon at the end was kinda for the same reason, and because snow at night just looks more beautiful, don't you think?


	4. From Haseo

This is the final letter, and it's waaay different than the others, please don't kill me over the change . . . or the fact that this is the end of the story . . . I thank everyone who has followed it and reviewed it.

KUDOS TO YOU ALL!

**Disclaimer:** It should be obvious as to why I don't own .Hack . . .

On to:

**My Pride on the Line**

**By: The Not so GeniusVampire **

**Final Chapter: From One Heart to Another**

There he laid a beautifully tragic figure. Due to a lack of light his skin had become deathly pale. Honey colored hair paled with his skin and fell sweat-dampened over his tired brow, cheeks, and neck. Eyes that were usually bright amber were dulled with sickness; however, they were far from lifeless. In fact, his mouth was turned upwards as though being deathly pale was the last thing on his mind. One of these more important things was the brunet boy hovering over him.

The boy's cool hand touched his forehead while the other hand moved to his own. It was the third time in the same hour he had done this. The man chuckled. "Ryou . . . I am fine now, honestly."

"Kaoru . . . your temperature skyrocketed _again_ . . ." Ryou brushed his soft bangs aside, his eyes gleaming with worry. ". . . It's scary 'cause it happens when you seem to be improving. . ."

Kaoru pulled himself into a sitting position. "This will pass . . ." He kissed the violet-eyed teen's forehead behind closed shutters. "There is no way I would leave you and Kite alone."

"Kite . . . he's worrying me too . . . he didn't look so good the last time I saw him . . . When I told him about you he all but fainted. On top of that he can't leave The World. . ."

"The two of you will get sick if you keep worrying like this. My condition will not worsen, and I refuse to die." He pulled Ryou into his tightening chest relishing the feel of the teen's cooler skin. "Ryou, I want you to do something for the three of us."

". . . What is it?"

"I want you to stop worrying about me and focus on Kite a little more. . ." He looked concerned. "You made a promise to him and it would be a travesty to break it over me. . . And I can tell you want to at least see him." His eyes shifted out the window. 'And so do I . . .'

Bewildered Ryou thought. 'How did he . . .? . . . Be it real life or online, it always feels like Kaoru can read my mind. . .' A single sweatdrop crawled down his cheek as he said "But it's impossible to leave your side I can't even leave when the doctor arrives."

Kaoru sighed. "You're doing it again . . . Let's do this: take my laptop and sit right here." He propped himself further up.

Ryou took the violet-skinned laptop and settled into Kaoru's lap. 'I hope he's all right. . .' He thought as he logged into The World.

*** Two Hours Later ***

With his chin nestled in his left hand, Kaoru inquired "What happened? You logged out rather quickly."

"Give me some credit I was there for a couple of hours. . ." He lowered his voice to a secretive whisper. "He was sleeping . . . I didn't think it was a good idea to wake him up so. . ."

"You watched him. . ." The amber-eyed man chuckled inwardly.

". . . Well, yeah, but I did leave him something . . . I think he'll like it." His voice trailed. "I hope he does . . ." The longer the young man spoke, the sadder his visage became.

"Ryou?" Kaoru's soothing voice echoed through Ryou's ears. "Was something wrong with him?"

Violet eyes darted all over the room. "I'm not sure . . . I don't think he knew I was there, but . . . he reacted like he did . . . although you never know with Kite . . . Then . . ." Ryou trailed off again and stood up. He walked over to the window and opened it. Kaoru flinched slightly as the light filtered in, at the same time his eyes seemed to have brightened. All of a sudden, Ryou jumped lightly back onto the bed, some of the sheets billowed around his legs and tangled them together. He leaned into Kaoru's lips saying. "Then I eased his sleeping pain." He gave a trace smile.

"That was rather poetic of you, Ryou, but what exactly did you do and weren't you even the least bit afraid of being seen?"

The brunet raised an eyebrow. ". . . To be honest . . . no . . . I didn't feel anything negative, and I wasn't thinking about anyone or anything else but Kite at the moment."

Kaoru simply smiled.

--- The World ---

Azure Kite sneezed out of his half sleep, '. . . That was odd . . . maybe someone is thinking of me . . .maybe not . . .' He rubbed his eyes with an odd feeling in his fingertips, in fact his face felt as though someone had touched it. That of course did not make sense, after all Azure Kite was not a sound sleeper; the slightest, breath, the lightest . . . touch near him would wake him in an instant. However, not only did he not feel anyone touch him, but he could still feel the lingering effects of it. It now felt . . . familiar . . . comforting. He brushed his cheek with that hand in an attempt to take the full feeling into his stitched body. As the final remnants of it faded his head felt much heavier and as he slowly lowered it his hat slipped off. He almost put it on without any real thought until he noticed something lining the inside.

It was a red and black little thing with a red-eyed, white-haired Grunty on the front. 'Is this from . . . Haseo . . .?' He flipped it over to see the young rogue's name scratched across its surface. Slowly, the knight opened it as if his fingers could barely move.

His eyes skimmed the first line and he laughed lightly.

_Hey Kite,_

_I told you that I'd stop by sooner than before, and I did, but . . . you were asleep. I tried to wake you up but you wouldn't, your loss I suppose, just kidding . . . seriously I'M KIDDING. Next time I'll e-mail you . . . or give you a big wet Willy bet that would wake you up. _

_On a serious note I am just now replying to your letter, I know I should have done this a good month ago, but I did not know how to reply. It's just sometimes I have a hard time handling my own emotions, so sometimes I don't know how to respond to the emotions of others. Like when Endrance first laid out his red carpet of emotions out to me for the first time. At first I found it strange after all I was responsible for reminding him of reality and how much he lost within it. All he told me was he that before I –saved- him all he could see was the darkness in reality . . . and that I brought him back into the light . . ._

_Confused as I was my heart did a few back flips that day._

_The same thing happened when you e-mailed me . . . to be honest I was a little scared of you. All I did was make your life difficult I even Data Drained you! And for a while I thought that the only reason I had your member address was because Aura gave it to me . . . You acted tense, yet unassuming around me, like you really weren't sure of what to think . . . the both of us were on pins and needles._

_The same day we formed an actual party, went to some random place, didn't pay attention to our surroundings, and even then tried to look everywhere else but at the person we were standing next to. That was how the day 'progressed', we couldn't seem to agree on . . . I believe it was a forest area and we couldn't agree on which direction to go in. at first we went with my suggestion, but yours turned out to be right. I remembered saying something that suggested you were right because you were a program . . .That resulted in a overheated argument and a fight where you almost knocked my block off with your bare hands . . . Then you left me behind . . . Surprisingly, you didn't leave the area; only jumped ahead to the statue. You looked upset, and I felt like a complete moron. When you heard me coming you jumped up . . ._

_. . . And . . . tripped . . ._

_I laughed. It slipped, I swear it did! After all, your feet hardly ever touched the ground so how did you trip and what in the world did you trip on? I was laughing at the irony . . . At the last minute I realized who I was laughing at and the trouble my mouth had already gotten me into. To my surprise, you were laughing too. You were scratching your cheek and laughing. When you stopped you told me that what I said hurt but I was entitled to my opinion; I could tell you wanted to add something, but to ask seemed like too much. Then you sighed; the sound of your voice doing something other than growling seemed strange, but not necessarily bad. _

_The issue was not brought up ever again and we tried again. I have to admit, the second time around felt a little better and for some reason easier than the first. The more I hung around you the more I began to see it, of course you laughed, joked around, and communicated more, and it did not feel as though you were forcing yourself. Kite, you have childishness about you. It's like you've found a way to be both innocent and sane despite the chaos, inequality, and injustice around you. That has to be the only way you forgive and forget so easily, either that or you have better ways to spend time with others aside from being angry at them . . . I just don't know even now there's no way I could be as trusting with people as you are. Then again, you have the ability to tell those with truly harmful intentions from those with a shred of decency in them._

_I also found that you cannot stand to be alone; I asked about it once, and you acted as though you had no idea of what I was talking about, but . . . it is written across your face, most of the time I could see this look of limitless despair in your eyes. It was times like those that made me not want to leave you alone for a second._

_Today seemed to be the breaking point. While you were sleeping, you were curled up tightly, as though to protect yourself from the rest of the world, or to protect yourself from your undeniable feelings. In addition, your eyes were shut tight, your bottom lip looked chewed up, and your hands jittered and twitched as though you were going to burst. I just wanted to pick you up and carry you to a place where pain were only a fleeting memory then it would not even be that. But you were asleep, and if you do not want to wake up you attack the closest disturbance . . . actually, you'll do that in your sleep too. Seriously, you were put to sleep once in a battle, and even though your feet were flat on the ground you nailed the first thing that came near you . . . it was a little scary to be honest._

_However, when I touched your shoulders, you did not even move, you even stopped shaking. When I tried to actually shake you awake though, you would not budge, I wonder if you knew I was there on a subconscious level . . . When I pulled you into my lap your lip twitched the way it does when you are amused. To be honest, I stole some of that time to type this . . . You had to have known my attention was partially split for when I looked back . . ._

_There were tears streaming down your face . . . warping it. My heart stopped and I wished there was more I could do than wipe them away, like actually be there when you need me to be instead of watching you fight it off on your own only to have it come back even worse. And I will be I swear to you I will actually make it in time for once, you deserve it more than anyone. I care about you and above all: _

_I Love You,_

_Ryou Misaki; Haseo_

_P.S.: I'll be back in a few minutes and if this letter was of any help please smile; even I think your smiles are cute._

Azure Kite fell backwards and breathed as though he had run an insurmountable distance. 'Haseo.' He thought. 'I never knew he watched me so closely . . . even when I told him I liked him he seemed to be in another world. . . In fact I thought he was ignoring me; suppose not.' His cheeks turned a faint reddish violet. 'What does he mean by cute? I didn't think he could see my mouth let alone know what my face looks like when I smile . . .'

All of a sudden he felt two arms wrap around his neck. "I can't believe you Kite," Haseo chided softly. "For the first time in your life you stayed in the same place." Nuzzling close he noticed a rather blank look on the AI's face. "What's wrong?"

Azure Kite shook only his head, but the rest of his body seemed to follow.

Haseo whirled him around and looked deeply into his jaded eyes. "You can't wave me off anymore like that, remember? In your letter you told me you trusted me completely, so can you trust me enough to help?"

". . ."

He massaged Azure Kite's slender arms. "C'mon you can tell me. . ."

"_. . ."_ Azure Kite sighed then pursed his lips and sighed. All at once his thoughts spilled from his mouth, a mouth that supposedly could not form words. "_This World . . . when I first opened my eyes to it, it seemed so vast . . . possibly endless. . . It seemed impossible to protect even though I was not necessarily alone, it seemed impossible . . . Now it's just mildly difficult, and yet . . ._" He paused. _"When I first tried it seemed easier that I thought at least. I didn't have to talk to anyone in fact; as long as I did my part no had to know I even existed. . . Things changed when I met you though; it was the first time I saw such close interaction between players; well at least it was the first time I found myself intruding on such a connection. It left an impression on me, one so deep that I began to observe the people I swore to protect. I saw close and distant relationships, happiness, sadness, pain, joy, sorrow . . . and love."_ Slowly he shut his eyes. _"The more I surveyed the people, the smaller this World itself became . . . I know that makes little sense, but that's how I felt. I guess in a way your own personal world seems to shrink when you're the only one in it . . . It's dark, lonely, and depressing, and in the end you just wish it were gone . . ."_

"You mean you wish you yourself were gone, don't you?"

Azure Kite nodded wordlessly. _"I did . . . especially when I found out what people thought of programs like me . . . The feeling dissipated when I actually talked eye to eye with you, even began to like you ways I never thought possible, but . . ."_

"But, what?" Haseo insisted.

"_But when my feelings for you were merely a crush, I found out what happened to those who stepped outside of the bounds of 'liking'. I also got a glimpse at who could be what . . ."_

"I'm not sure I understand . . ."

"_I'm a program, so I'm not allowed to have feelings to begin with, so to speak, but Endrance is allowed to love who or whatever he pleases, because the entire World will love him back in some way . . . Something like that . . ."_

"Something like that, huh? When you put it that way, the World is just another place to profile you . . . It's like you can't escape it, even though the World is meant to be an escape to begin with."

_"It isn't for me . . . I was 'born' here and my life will end here as well."_

With a pained look in his eyes, Haseo mumbled. "Please don't sound so morbid . . ."

_"Why not? It's only a fact."_

"Kite in case you've forgotten this is the first time, I've ever heard you speak, not only that but for the first time ever I don't have to guess what's on your mind you can tell me freely. I was just kinda hoping you'd be thinking something a little more cheerful."

_"I do think positively sometimes, but this whole 'you should fall in love only with this type of person or gender' mentality bothers me . . . It's about the only thing on my mind right now. If you'd like I can be my usual quiet self again."_

"No, by all means keep talking, like I said it's nice to hear you speak your mind as opposed to just assuming what you're thinking about." The young rogue's voice softened with each word.

Azure Kite smiled in a secretive manner. _"You always seemed to know anyway . . ."_ the bridge of his nose turned a faint red.

"I suppose I know you pretty well then, don't I?" He kissed the bridge of Azure Kite's burning nose. Then with a little bit of difficulty, he hoisted the AI into his arms; suddenly his 'load' disappeared.

Haseo stood with his arms outstretched and shock in his eyes. He looked all around him before becoming aware of a shadow gathering around him, he chanced to look up. "E-Endrance?! What are you doing?!"

". . . Waiting to become well enough by your standards is much too long of a burden to bear. Besides, everything I truly need to recover is here in the World." Endrance purred, although there was a bit of a rasp to his voice. "Haseo, all I need is you . . ." he smiled warmly in the rogue's direction then he adjusted Azure Kite in his arms. ". . . And Kite. . ."

The jade eyed knight grabbed Endrance's neck in alarm. When he finally had a decent view of his feline like ruby eyes he relaxed. Shortly afterward he bristled. _"Wait a second, you're not well enough even to play?!"_

"I see you do have a voice that is quite fortunate." The alluring blade brandisher said in a rather airy tone.

Momentarily stopped, Azure Kite replied slowly. _"Well . . . I could always speak I just never had the need to . . ."_

Haseo tilted his head. "Seriously?"

_"Yea . . . my voice went sour because I never used it, which is why I sound so strange now . . ."_ His eyes formed something between a smile and a smirk; then it turned into a wide-eyed grimace. _". . . En . . . you'll have to try harder than that to distract me. You're still sick."_

"Are you worried you will contract what I have?"

_"No! I'm worried about you!"_

"Kite you sound as bad as Ryou." Endrance chided.

"Bad? He's right," Haseo frowned slightly. "You have to be careful, after all, you're waving off what most people are lucky to _survive_."

"Haseo . . . I'm not that careless . . ."

_"We're just saying we'd go crazy if something happened to you, and includes if you get worse."_ Azure Kite said sternly. _"And I know I want to be selfish . . ." _He gently touched Endrance's pale cheek. _"Like you, everything I have is here in this world; however, you also exist in the other world, so please take care of yourself when I can't . . . kay?"_ The knight's eyes had become glassy almost transparent.

A rather dreamy look graced the aqua haired man's ruby eyes. "Kite . . . this intense look of worry does not suit you . . ." he brushed Azure Kite's cheek lightly with the back of his hand. "How long have you been in this troubled state?"

_"For far too long, but the real question is, now that you've seen my face, will you listen to my words?"_

Slowly Endrance backed into a sitting position. "But of course, I would not want to worry you anymore . . ."

_"You better not . . ."_ Azure Kite tugged at Endrance's hair absent- mindedly.

Haseo leaned back on Endrance's side, but his head rested partially on Azure Kite's lap. "And to think there used to be a time when we just wanted to rip each other's heads off." He said rather airily. "Now we care so much we're paranoid over each other." He laughed. "And now sitting around like this; allowing nothing else to interrupt our lives . . . If nothing else I ever say or do is right beyond this point then so be it; I'll know for a fact that this is one thing I'll never regret."

Still curling his finger around Endrance's hair, Azure Kite reached slightly and twined it around Haseo's. "I won't either . . ." he proceeded to wrap a stray lock of his own hair around the same finger. "Moments that were meant to be always happen."

"It is said that you know instantly who you meant to be with, be it in the form of attraction or intense hate, you simply _know_ that this person or being will not leave your life gracefully –if at all. Nothing can keep you away from them either, temperament, likes, dislikes, gender . . . and even where they came from. All that matters is where you go with them. It is a bond that transcends beyond yourself . . ."

"Including your selfish pride."

**.My Pride on the Line// End**

* * *

A/N: Gee, this story has been a real roller coaster for me . . . And now that it's over . . . it's almost sad.

-There is one thing I would like to apologize for (aside from the chapter being so long) and that is Haseo's letter . . . for some reason it sounded more like a narrative. Even so I still liked it and it did not sound too impersonal, did it?

-And Azure Kite's speaking bit at the end I just thought that was precious! Speaking of which, there's one line: "_But when my feelings for you were merely a crush, I found out what happened to those who stepped outside of the bounds of 'liking'. _-I think I've hinted of prejudice in the beginning of the story, well this is what Azure Kite was mentioning. Being an observer he's probably seen some awful brutality spawned from prejudice. Just insert a scene after that line, it was meant to play with your mind.

-Oh yea and I believe Haseo shows surprise twice when Azure Kite mentions he could talk all along. There is a three month gap from when I typed those two parts so I forgot exactly what I put down. However, it could also be seen as Haseo being _that _floored by it.

Eheh time for the GeniusVampire to be quiet and hope her readership drops a line.

Sincerely yours,

The Not so GeniusVampire


End file.
